Monthly Archives: May 2013

The Importance Of Trust

As Mental Health Awareness Week is upon us, it is probably one of the most crucial times to remind people that it is OK to talk.

Trust is an important part of any relationship of any kind, but particularly when there is ill mental health involved, it becomes even more prevalent. To trust someone with thoughts of suicide or self harm, self loathing and self doubt, is difficult and something that many of us struggle with. The simple fact of the matter is that unless you trust someone and talk about how you feel, your mood is not necessarily going to improve quicker. Talking gives you a release, it prevents the thoughts that surround and perpetuate certain aspects of your feelings, from manifesting themselves deep inside of you. It also helps to simply have someone else know how you feel, even if there is little they can do to help, it is better than no-one knowing. Sometimes it can be difficult to trust people because we fear their reaction, but if you don’t open up to anyone, you will never know what that reaction could be. There is no doubt that at times it isn’t as positive as we expect, but similarly a lot of the time people are willing to listen and to comfort you, if not try to help you. It is my belief that there is always someone out there who is willing to try to help you and support you but unless you open up to people then it is impossible for them to help.

When you’re feeling full of irrationality it can be even more difficult to trust people. It can be difficult to take a negative reaction and a knock back, but it is possible to recover from that and go again with trusting someone with how you feel. Giving up on talking about your feelings is a sure fire way to lessening the chances of improving your mood. 

Of course it is not as simple as just saying “I am suicidal” or “I want to hurt myself” because it’s not something people really WANT to hear. Regardless of whether people want to hear it though, it doesn’t mean that they’re not willing to hear it. For instance, my friend has been struggling of late and of course I don’t want to hear that she has been struggling because it upsets me, but at the same time I know I can help her and that talking about how she feels to me helps, so I am happy to listen to her. 

The critical thing is to try not to be afraid of what people may think or say. If you are good friends with someone, then you will have a gut instinct as to what their reaction may be, there are signs and there are hints from the things people say and how they react to certain things, as to how they will react to how you feel. If you need support then you have got to ask for it, because ultimately it is you who is most important and there are people, professional and non professional who are able to give you some sort of support. 

When you speak about how you feel, it is best to be specific but aware of what you are saying. To be clear and concise but not too blunt or to say something in a manner that will shock whomever you are speaking to.

Trusting people with how you feel is often rewarded with strong friendship and kindness. Support and happiness. Whilst you may not be happy, talking to people can go a long way towards helping you understand, control and manage how you feel. 

Remember that it is ok to talk, and anyone who tries to claim otherwise needs to look at how we treat physical health and how openly we discuss physical illness, and then come back and say it’s not ok to talk about physical illness as well as mental illness. If they do, then they’re not really worth your time or energy.

This then ties in with the theme of Mental Health Awareness Week 2013; Physical Activity. 

Physical activity is a brilliant way to boost your mood. Whether you feel like going for a run, or just walking down to the shops, it really does make a difference. Fresh air and adrenaline together act as a brilliant catalyst to improve your mood and bring positivity into your mind.

Trust in yourself, trust in your friends. It’s OK to talk.